Breathing you in

I breathe you in
You’re a hair away
But I can’t bridge the gap
Oh, I’d give anything to defy
The force that holds me back
Just a whisper between us
You shiver where you stand
Every molecule charged
I try to still my shaking hand
I’m lightheaded by your presence
The smell of your shampoo
It’s taking all my self-control
Not to take hold of you
My lips so yearn to kiss you
And my hands to hold you tight
And yet I know I mustn’t
Because it isn’t right
I’ve got to keep on walking
Because I’m not yours, not today
So although I ache with love for you
I have to walk away.

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You tease me with the lightest touch
But I want so much more
Because even that feather touch
Shakes me to the core
You look at me a moment
But I yearn to hold your gaze
Drown inside your pupils
I could stare at you for days
You give me a casual nod
Say it’s nice to see me too
But you don’t know that all day long
I’ve been craving to see you
‘Goodnight then’ you wish me
But I want to keep you up
I’m desperate to tell you
That you make my heart erupt
But I know that you can’t hear it
I know you’ll turn away
I know you’ll beg for silence
And I’ll lose every single day
That I could have you near me
Hear your words and watch your walk
And so, to keep you close to me
I’ll be content to make small talk.

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Pawn in your palm

They say you’re an ass, to forget you
And I know they’re probably right
But my heart can’t seem to see
Your crime in black and white
It’s searching for excuses
To keep you in my life
Plucking at sanguine moments
Among years of mental strife
I used to know what I would stand for
I used to be so sure
But you fixed me of my cleverness
Loving you, that was the cure
And now I’m but a child
Clinging to your arm
Needing you to love me
A pawn upon your palm.

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I’m clinging tightly to you
But you just keep slipping through
They say that you are dying
And I don’t know what to do
I want to keep you by me
I’m fighting for you to live
But every cell in you is breaking
And you have nothing left to give
It kills me to watch you suffer
I yearn to take your place
I dream of spiriting you far away
To a kinder, safer place
But alas, this world is cruel
And I can only watch you die
Crawl under your bedsheets
And hold you till our last goodbye.

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Look harder

The tears are streaming down my heart
As I’m trying to tell you of my pain
But I can see from your grinning face
My efforts are in vain
You fell in love with a happy girl
And you can’t see past the smile
You can’t feel sorrow build inside
Unhappy is not your style
So today I feel so lonely
I’m gripped with terrible pain
And yet you are oblivious
You can’t even tell I’m not the same
You’re blinded by your vision
Of a gleeful poster child
Promoting fun and laughter
Though inside I feel so wild
I don’t know why it happens
Or why I can’t escape
But I need a loving hand
To pull me from this place
Please reach out and save me
Please look past the smile
I’m begging you, look harder
Please, just for a while?

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There’s a hole in my head
Though my heart is full
And it overflows under my eyelids
Even as my face is still
I’m terrified because I love you
And I never want to let you go
But you bring me such heartache
I have never felt so low
Why would you hurt me
In this way again?
Why would you push me
Back into this pain?
Haven’t I suffered
Enough from loving you?
Must I continue to suffer
After you say you love me too?
I knew that there’d be problems
But this particular one
Was not something I expected
From the one I called The One
I thought that we were past the hump
I thought we’d be okay
I thought you’d treasure what we had
In lieu of yesterday
But alas, you were not finished
With my tattered heart
I suppose you won’t be satisfied
Until it’s ripped apart
I’ve been such a foolish lover
I thought it meant as much to you
You’ve cheated me of my fairytale
The ball and the pumpkin too
Gone are my high ideals of love
Gone are my naïve dreams
You’ve left me a broken creature
Whose eyes no longer gleam.

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Euphoric melody

Just me and the music, dancing together
Tip-toeing and skipping, now light as a feather
We’re waltzing and gliding and floating together
Just me and the music, this moment, forever
Now spinning and lifting, now leaping, now sliding
Building and building, now dropping and diving
Just me and the music, this melody of mine
A rhythm so perfect, a rhythm to stop time.

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